The Bicycle Diaries: Hills

I had to embrace the the idea of climbing hills if I was going to get anywhere. I was either that of move to Kansas. I already live in Smallville, but that's another story.

I remember the first time that I went on a "long ride" and by "long ride" I mean somewhere past the library. I only made it to the county line and it was that one hill that almost killed me. Almost.

I was already going uphill, slightly, then right before the line is a short steep hill. It's not the Tourmalet but it might as well have been.

I decided then and there that it wasn't going to beat me. After a week or so of recovery I tried it again and once I made it over the top I kept going. Yay me!

I didn't try to sprint up the hill. I wasn't trying to show that particular patch of Earth who's boss. I still don't do that today. I don't want to burn myself out. But now that I am writing this part of me want to go out and do just that. If I'm dead at the end of the week you know what killed me.

I only go so far north because it goes downhill again and I would never ever be able to make it back home. That is assuming that I ever make it there in the first place. There are a lot of curves. Those are fun--in a car. On a bike it would be suicide.

It would be one thing if the road was closed or sparsely traveled but it's not. I cannot apex the curves like I need to--I have to hug the white line. (Insert your own cocaine joke here.)

However, there are a lot of those "Share the Road" signs along the way. But, much like "Speed Limit" and "Stop" signs people only see them as suggestion. That is when they aren't completely ignoring then.

Did I mention that this road is fun in a car? Well, I'm not the only person who thinks so and I really don't want to go through the windshield of a Mustang GT.

So, as I near the summit, I take some less travelled roads. Unfortunately there has been a lot of logging going on recently and I don't want to end up on the radiator of a Freightliner. That's too bad really since there is one road with a covered bridge that I really like .

Then there is this other road I like to call "the Roller Coaster." It goes slightly uphill for a bit then it's mostly downhill. It's a bit less than a mile. I guess. I don't have a GPS or a power meter or any of that stuff on my bike. If I could afford those things then I could afford a better bike. Besides, a power meter on my bike would be like an altimeter on a paper airplane--useless.

Along the way there are two small rises and if have enough speed I can make it over both without having to pedal. I may not be Bradley Wiggins but my aero tuck is pretty good.

If you watch the Tour de France you often see riders descend while sitting on the top tube. When they do this Phil Liggett will say, "Don't try this at home." I tried it once. Once. For about half a second. It was at that point that I realized why AG2R La Mondiale wear brown shorts.