I recently ordered some stuff online and inside the package were some coupons. That's nice. One was for 250 free business cards. Really? What I need are "none of your business" cards. Those would be fun to hand out at gatherings, parties, funerals, etc.
Another one was a $100 wine voucher. I don't drink that much wine. I haven't consumed that much wine in my lifetime and I live in a region where the most popular wines are Mad Dog 20/20 and Boone's Farm.
In the 80s this would've come in handy if it were for wine coolers because I might have actually had a date. Or at least a one night stand. Or an encounter behind a convenience store. Hopefully with a woman.
The real punch line that it's illegal to order wine online in Georgia. Or at least it was, I haven't kept up. However, it is still legal to whine online. That's another story.
The third and final coupon was for plus size women's clothing. How do they know about that? I thought I removed those pictures.
What really gets me is the term "plus size." What is plus size anyway? Anything over size 0? Zero is defined as a neutral or starting point. If that is the case I have met a few 00s in my life. However I don't think they were part of the British Secret Service. It's far more likely that they were agents of SPECTRE.
What makes things even more confusing is the picture of the model on the coupon. I wouldn't consider her plus size at all. That is unless you count tall as plus size. I like tall women. I'm sure that it is a Freudian thing--everything else is.
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